WHEN THE ROAD ENDS
I WILL NO LONGER BLOG HERE.
BUT I WONT CLOSE THIS BLOG
BECAUSE IT HOLDS ALL OUR MEMORIES
WHICH I CAN NEVER FORGET
AND WILL REMAIN IN MY HEART FOREVER
LOVE U ALWAYS
Time sometimes flies really fast.
Like now, when 1 month have passed.
Since I've seen you. Since we've met. Since I've held your hand and hold you tight.
Since I've played a piece for you. Since we ate, watch a movie, played wii, ran in the rain together.
Everyday I miss you, knowing how much I've hurt you.
I stil cant accept wtf is happening right now.
Mayb one day, we'll be back together. Whether as friends or couple I really dont know.
Time sometimes pass really slow.
Like now, not knowing if your love for me is true.
We cant buy time, we only can spend it.
All the things u say might just be empty promises.
I cannot control ur actions, ur feelings.
But,
time stil moves, and we all stil have to wake up for work, to eat, to get things done.
never said it will be easier each day.
never wanted for u to cry for me.
never asked for u to love me
never knew things could turn out this way
I only can figure out one thing.
I think I stil love you,
Cos only u can make me angry, make me cry, make me happy, make me feel lost, make me feel like I belong, all at once.
I dun believe it was a wasted 4 years. I stil hold our happy and sad moments together. Although alot of things we dun see eye to eye. We stil respect each other and try to commit. I like writing a bloody essay on my love story. But some things I just dunno how to tell u. So I just blog about it.
I stil worry about your meals, your work, your stress, things I can do better.
But all only think in my heart. Im no one to do that for you now.
Crying with the rain, my heart is a blur as my eyes right now.
You both deserve so much better then me.
I cant even make a fucking decision.
Single life is better and worse.
But I'll survive.
Do I love you?
I dont know.
Then why am I crying my soul out.
I dont know.
All the things we've been through. All the quarrels. All the flowers. All the birthdays, valentine's days, christmas days, school days. Poor days, rich days, happy days, sad days. 1542 days as of today we spent with each other. Dont mean a fucking thing to u?
Why do you have to appear in my life. Why did you let me love you, miss you.
You.
See all my flaws and stil love me for all my flaws.
He
Dont see all my flaws cos there's nothing he dont love about me.
You.
Like me to do things to make you happy cos you know it makes me happy too.
He.
Like to do things to make me happy cos he'll be happy too.
You.
Hate to make mistakes cos you want us to be perfect.
He.
Does all the mistakes cos he know he'll never be perfect.
You.
Make me want to marry you.
He.
Wants to marry me.
Both.
Love me with all ur heart.
Willing to sacrifice ur life for me.
Work like fuck for a future tgt.
Just want to keep me and love me forever.
Makes u feel that its time to settle down and have a life.
Have only me in ur heart.
I dont deserve,
to be loved that much. Not by both of you.
I'm not worth it.
I din expect it could hurt so much.
Somehow this reminds me of someone who told me, its never good to love 2 people, who broke up because he did what i'm doing now. I wanna tell u, u were right. U were right all along. And u were right, that its impossible to let go.
I cant let go. But I really dun deserve anything right now, other den lots of tissue and hanky, and shoulders to cry on.
TIME OUT.
I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I zHATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.
Wee!
1st day went really smoothly! Sold a bag and a wrislet! =D Alot of things to be learnt. Not really sure what to do. So lost and blur. But everyone was really nice. They tried to help when they could.
6 months contract. Im sure will pass by really fast.
I'm stil having fever and flu. SUX.
The heart wants what it cannot take, and needs what it cannot give.
No.1 will always remain as no.1
I Love You.
Loads of updates.
Most importantly, I working again!
Paragon, Coach. Starting next month in March. 6 month's contract.
I'm really tired from all the quarrelling and crying. I just want things to be the way they were. Simple and happy. Even if I turn back time, things will stil be the same right now.
I dont regret.
My phone drop in water. Yes dun laugh! LOL and now i'm using a buang phone cos my contract not up yet. Need wait 1 month. Dun laugh liao la! Next month I dunno what phone to get. Everybody say iphone cos everyone's using it and I said I dowan follow everyone and yet now when I have no phone, I think I'll just get iphone. zzz lol sia.
Suddenly I'm all outta words.
Hmm.
Think I'll update the birthday stuff next post.
Dun get excited guys! I'm super uber excited myself! LOL! Wee!
Jobless.
Ok I think I've said that before.
Tired.
From all the sleepless nights.
Emo.
Just kidding!
Haha.. Alot has been going on recently. Emotional roller coaster nia. Fk this family, other den my sis. U're the world to me man. =)
This update actually nt much of an update. Cos too many things going on and I dowan to type it all out.
Thanks gf for hearing all my problems and giving me idea.. though nt much use. Cos stil cant settle anything.
Really dunno why I have such parents but I'm sure its some kinda test or what to make me stronger. To be independent and realise that actually Im really really lucky to have people around me that love me and teng wo in ways that I feel I'm worth something.
Alvin faster come back leh, I got so many things to tell u. Ur 10 day outfield is killing me. 10 days used to pass by so fast. But the last 1 week I felt I almost died somewhere.
Dear dun always work so hard leh. Sometimes I feel stress for u and that I cant do anything but only encourage u everyday with sms and calls. I'm like ur kp bin. Forever cannot fill up. I guess thats all I can do bah. Love u always.
Adrian! Here's ur update lor. But abit emo la.. Paiseh ah.. Nv update cos too many bad things happening. See ur name here sure gan dong one right! LOLL!!
k la, sign off liao before I crumble into nothing blogging abt things I dowan to think about.
P.s. Anybody got spare room/rooms for rent? Let me know thanks =)
Ok I think I've said that before.
Tired.
From all the sleepless nights.
Emo.
Just kidding!
Haha.. Alot has been going on recently. Emotional roller coaster nia. Fk this family, other den my sis. U're the world to me man. =)
This update actually nt much of an update. Cos too many things going on and I dowan to type it all out.
Thanks gf for hearing all my problems and giving me idea.. though nt much use. Cos stil cant settle anything.
Really dunno why I have such parents but I'm sure its some kinda test or what to make me stronger. To be independent and realise that actually Im really really lucky to have people around me that love me and teng wo in ways that I feel I'm worth something.
Alvin faster come back leh, I got so many things to tell u. Ur 10 day outfield is killing me. 10 days used to pass by so fast. But the last 1 week I felt I almost died somewhere.
Dear dun always work so hard leh. Sometimes I feel stress for u and that I cant do anything but only encourage u everyday with sms and calls. I'm like ur kp bin. Forever cannot fill up. I guess thats all I can do bah. Love u always.
Adrian! Here's ur update lor. But abit emo la.. Paiseh ah.. Nv update cos too many bad things happening. See ur name here sure gan dong one right! LOLL!!
k la, sign off liao before I crumble into nothing blogging abt things I dowan to think about.
P.s. Anybody got spare room/rooms for rent? Let me know thanks =)
2 more weeks to being jobless.
I worry abt alot of things. Alot of things on my mind. They just keep swimming around and around. Make me cannot slp sia. Arrrrr.
Having 2nd thoughts abt the party and stuff. Though there is progress, not sure if mayb I shld just have a private party with close friends or a big one with hopefully all the ppl in my guestlist. Later plan dao so much, nobody wanna go. LOL! no la, i mean cant expect all the people to turn up right.
Hmm. on other things, shld I find a job now? or wait till after CNY. Of cos ideal would be a part time job preferably on weekdays ONLY. So I can prepare for the party and study music and learn driving, and do all the things I want to do.
Tml gonna be another boring day at work. YAWNS!
I worry abt alot of things. Alot of things on my mind. They just keep swimming around and around. Make me cannot slp sia. Arrrrr.
Having 2nd thoughts abt the party and stuff. Though there is progress, not sure if mayb I shld just have a private party with close friends or a big one with hopefully all the ppl in my guestlist. Later plan dao so much, nobody wanna go. LOL! no la, i mean cant expect all the people to turn up right.
Hmm. on other things, shld I find a job now? or wait till after CNY. Of cos ideal would be a part time job preferably on weekdays ONLY. So I can prepare for the party and study music and learn driving, and do all the things I want to do.
Tml gonna be another boring day at work. YAWNS!
Yep, One of those sleepless nights where I cant sleep.
Alot things on my mind.
I hate it when I think alot, and then tell myself, "Oi, u think too much la" and then 2 seconds later I start thinking again. Zzzzzzz
Think got use meh?! Why my stupid brain keeping thinking abt stuff..
Stuff that is not impt but I think about it and it becomes impt. Arrrr....
Ok la, I just wanna blog to update a little and move on about the driving thing in my previous post.
2 weeks more to my jobless life. 2 VERY slow weeks to pass.... bad crowd.. dun feel like new year at all. Hahh..
Sorry to those who I owe meetups and meals and catch-ups. Dont complain liao la!!
A little note - things that I think are bad qualities of me. lol
Things that are hard for me to do:
1. Telling lies
2. Letting go, emotionally mostly
3. Asking direct questions
4. Reading maps
5. Rejecting people
Things that are easy for me to do:
1. Cry
2. Spending money (this one everyone is guilty of la, dun kid urself! haha)
3. Trusting people
Those are the things I really wanna change abt me but cant. And I get angry cos I'm like that and end up cant really handle things properly.
Sometimes I really dunno how I'll survive without dear. Almost everything I rely on him, or mayb cos he's always being protective and do things for me without me knowing.
Cant believe we actually had a huge quarrel over minor things after all these years.
And I realised without him I really dont have anyone to turn to for shelter.
As in someone who I can just cry and be vunerable infront of, and not just listen to me grumbling and sobbing and tell me things that I already know.
This is reality ma, honestly speaking say is say only. Anyone can say ya u'll be here for me. But words are empty without action. When sth really happens, u can confirm u'll be there?
In reality, all comes down to yourself when u're alone in the dark.
And maybe that's how we all grow up and move on.
Alot things on my mind.
I hate it when I think alot, and then tell myself, "Oi, u think too much la" and then 2 seconds later I start thinking again. Zzzzzzz
Think got use meh?! Why my stupid brain keeping thinking abt stuff..
Stuff that is not impt but I think about it and it becomes impt. Arrrr....
Ok la, I just wanna blog to update a little and move on about the driving thing in my previous post.
2 weeks more to my jobless life. 2 VERY slow weeks to pass.... bad crowd.. dun feel like new year at all. Hahh..
Sorry to those who I owe meetups and meals and catch-ups. Dont complain liao la!!
A little note - things that I think are bad qualities of me. lol
Things that are hard for me to do:
1. Telling lies
2. Letting go, emotionally mostly
3. Asking direct questions
4. Reading maps
5. Rejecting people
Things that are easy for me to do:
1. Cry
2. Spending money (this one everyone is guilty of la, dun kid urself! haha)
3. Trusting people
Those are the things I really wanna change abt me but cant. And I get angry cos I'm like that and end up cant really handle things properly.
Sometimes I really dunno how I'll survive without dear. Almost everything I rely on him, or mayb cos he's always being protective and do things for me without me knowing.
Cant believe we actually had a huge quarrel over minor things after all these years.
And I realised without him I really dont have anyone to turn to for shelter.
As in someone who I can just cry and be vunerable infront of, and not just listen to me grumbling and sobbing and tell me things that I already know.
This is reality ma, honestly speaking say is say only. Anyone can say ya u'll be here for me. But words are empty without action. When sth really happens, u can confirm u'll be there?
In reality, all comes down to yourself when u're alone in the dark.
And maybe that's how we all grow up and move on.
When I go home, it means I go to my room. I go into my room and never come out. I only go out to pee & shit, shower, find food or go my sis's room. I eat in my room, watch tv in my room, use laptop in my room. I hate it out there.
I'm out more than I'm home. And that's the way I want it. My family = me and my sis. That's it. The less I talk to my mom the better. Who cares if she sees this shit. I dont care. Why are my parents like that. Why other ppl's parents are understanding and thoughtful and motherly! My mom's selfishness has no boundaries. And i'm not exaggerating. I've tried. For years, literally..
Here's proof. And i'm blogging it in black and white to document it. Havent been talking to my mom since september. (Since I started working) The only time I talk to her is when I give her money, when I come home and she nags abt some shit. Silence has been good so far. And I know its good when I talk to her.
Story. Will tell it as objectively as possible. (My thoughts in brackets)
Asking her casually if she would sponsor me to learn driving. (Just ask for fun, who knows right? Although asking might be a bad idea, but dun ask = no chance) Mayb next time can send her to places.
Her immediate reponse was: "Wow, learn driving expensive right? need at least 1k horr" (1k to u like peanuts luh). "No no, cannot, very expensive leh. Later u wana use my car how. Then I will very inconvenient right?"
"Can drive u to places ma."
She continues her rant. "Later I sponsor u then in the end cannot use car cos u will want to borrow, why would I want to inconvenient myself!"
"Later u use my car I more scared ah, more scared u know."
"You think if u I want to go orchard ask u fetch u will fetch? U think u will? I dont think so right?"
(fk la bitch, this isnt all abt u u u can)
"You think I'm that kinda person meh? I alr say can drive u to places wad, if not learn driving for what?"
"So u can use the car lor! borrow borrow, i need to use everyday one leh i got work how u use if u learn driving?"
(So u trying to say that u sponsor me is wasted money cos u will use car everyday and wont let me use? only if u wana go orchard then u ask me fetch which u think I wont? wtf la bitch)
"If you think I'm that kinda person then so be it lo."
Her reply is power:
"Why u like that! I'm just saying later u need to use the car then I very inconvenient right?"
(Why isit all about u?)
She cont.
"Maybe next time when I old and cant see cant drive then u can go learn driving wad. Then I dun mind sponsor la."
I repeated myself, knowing she doesnt hear ppl's replies.
"If u think Im that kinda person then its ok la. Forget I ask, I go learn driving with my own money and get my own car. Next time u cant drive cant see not my prob. Since u think I'm that kinda person also no point."
She rants sth else and goes to her room. Who cares what she say. Conversation ended.
Cant believe how selfish she is.
Wait till she's a blind bitch with no sense of driving then sponsor me to learn driving? By then I think my kids start working already la, sponsor what shit.
So u see, this is no joke. When I say silence is golden. Its pure golden like fresh honey pouring out from a bee's hive. Cant even have a decent conversation with her.
Thanks mom for teaching me to be independent. Everytime when sth cocks up, she's busy at work. Nv pick up the phone. Too busy earning money for herself then to care abt our calls. I sometimes feel like not caring abt my parents. Whatever happens their business. They care the most is money money money! Nv cherish, nv try. All for own gain, selfish actions.
Xian shi as we call it, we stil owe our lives to them. I feel as if I'm no longer their responsibility and yet they are my responsibility now. But how are they my responsibilty when I'm not ready for it yet.
Fk care la, I take care of myself can alr. They so bz earning money can take care of themselves alr.
No one can uds, other then my sis. So dont bother telling me to take it easy. Cos it just doesnt work that way.
I'm out more than I'm home. And that's the way I want it. My family = me and my sis. That's it. The less I talk to my mom the better. Who cares if she sees this shit. I dont care. Why are my parents like that. Why other ppl's parents are understanding and thoughtful and motherly! My mom's selfishness has no boundaries. And i'm not exaggerating. I've tried. For years, literally..
Here's proof. And i'm blogging it in black and white to document it. Havent been talking to my mom since september. (Since I started working) The only time I talk to her is when I give her money, when I come home and she nags abt some shit. Silence has been good so far. And I know its good when I talk to her.
Story. Will tell it as objectively as possible. (My thoughts in brackets)
Asking her casually if she would sponsor me to learn driving. (Just ask for fun, who knows right? Although asking might be a bad idea, but dun ask = no chance) Mayb next time can send her to places.
Her immediate reponse was: "Wow, learn driving expensive right? need at least 1k horr" (1k to u like peanuts luh). "No no, cannot, very expensive leh. Later u wana use my car how. Then I will very inconvenient right?"
"Can drive u to places ma."
She continues her rant. "Later I sponsor u then in the end cannot use car cos u will want to borrow, why would I want to inconvenient myself!"
"Later u use my car I more scared ah, more scared u know."
"You think if u I want to go orchard ask u fetch u will fetch? U think u will? I dont think so right?"
(fk la bitch, this isnt all abt u u u can)
"You think I'm that kinda person meh? I alr say can drive u to places wad, if not learn driving for what?"
"So u can use the car lor! borrow borrow, i need to use everyday one leh i got work how u use if u learn driving?"
(So u trying to say that u sponsor me is wasted money cos u will use car everyday and wont let me use? only if u wana go orchard then u ask me fetch which u think I wont? wtf la bitch)
"If you think I'm that kinda person then so be it lo."
Her reply is power:
"Why u like that! I'm just saying later u need to use the car then I very inconvenient right?"
(Why isit all about u?)
She cont.
"Maybe next time when I old and cant see cant drive then u can go learn driving wad. Then I dun mind sponsor la."
I repeated myself, knowing she doesnt hear ppl's replies.
"If u think Im that kinda person then its ok la. Forget I ask, I go learn driving with my own money and get my own car. Next time u cant drive cant see not my prob. Since u think I'm that kinda person also no point."
She rants sth else and goes to her room. Who cares what she say. Conversation ended.
Cant believe how selfish she is.
Wait till she's a blind bitch with no sense of driving then sponsor me to learn driving? By then I think my kids start working already la, sponsor what shit.
So u see, this is no joke. When I say silence is golden. Its pure golden like fresh honey pouring out from a bee's hive. Cant even have a decent conversation with her.
Thanks mom for teaching me to be independent. Everytime when sth cocks up, she's busy at work. Nv pick up the phone. Too busy earning money for herself then to care abt our calls. I sometimes feel like not caring abt my parents. Whatever happens their business. They care the most is money money money! Nv cherish, nv try. All for own gain, selfish actions.
Xian shi as we call it, we stil owe our lives to them. I feel as if I'm no longer their responsibility and yet they are my responsibility now. But how are they my responsibilty when I'm not ready for it yet.
Fk care la, I take care of myself can alr. They so bz earning money can take care of themselves alr.
No one can uds, other then my sis. So dont bother telling me to take it easy. Cos it just doesnt work that way.
My last month in IMM. dreadful sales. gulps!
Somehow I have alot of things I wanna do. But stil I dont have a plan. lol.. jialat.
Things I wanna do: Go back to flute, piano and get that diploma which I've bean dragging for so long. Get a partime job so that I can do those things and stil have money. LOL. Learn driving? For convenience sake cos I'm so darn lazy to go to places. Esp when I always go out at night. Which means I need a GOOD paying partime job. HAHA!
And of cos the big thing that I wanna do is to plan my 21st birthday party! haha ok luh ideas I give for juan to execute. HEE! Thanks and muacks in advance! I have already drawn up the guest list ( so exciting! about 70+ ppl so far ) Hopefully most ppl can make it. =p
Plan so far:
Countdown party on the 10th April - Sat night. Lucky me! =) All u NS guys better make it LOL!
Must have: food, drinks and music!
Location: Function room / Club / Some place that can thon, but dowan chalet. (Suggestions are welcomed, hee)
Photographer needed!! To follow me and take pics. hahha..
DJ, needed depending on location.
Will contact people when most of the above things are decided. Guest list will be posted on this blog so people can see who's going.
~That's all for now~
I thought bananas are anti-depressants. I ate 2 this morning and I'm stil feeling like shit.
Came down with some sorta flu and fever..
Haha, I can imagine u guys saying, "Shir! Why u soo weak!"
My last post also blogged during my last sickness.. sometimes I wonder if I have some chronic sickness.. keep falling ill.. LOL! kidding luh. Have to admit maybe I'm really just weak..
Lack of sleep and water and time-off to relax.
Busy whole week, working and playing!
I know I cant be greedy, so I shld take some time and cherish those who were there for me. And for those fakers who weren't u can just go fk off. lol
OK, Thanks juan for being so understanding as always. Christmas is always a busy week for us and we dont have to say much to know whats on each other's mind. So, I will make time for you, no matter what. =) Gotta meet up soon! XOXO.
Thanks my gf, karmun for always cheering me up when I'm down and making me happy whenever we meet! Lurve ur christmas present this year! Will always bring it with me. Muacks!
Thanks vin for being such a sweetheart and a good friend. Always finding time for me though u're so busy with the tough life in army. Must jiayou yea! Huggies!
Thanks mei, for ur late-night-cant-sleep company and with you its like our world of our own. Crazy and quarrelling times are never ending..! wahaha.. muackmuack..
Thanks feng for visiting me after work on several occasions.
Thanks to kt, my honourable ass friend who happen to see me working, twice! U nv fail to be my "great" friend. LOL!
Thanks to those who wished me merry christmas!
Lastly, to my deariest lao gong, thanks for being there with me everyday and everynight for the last 4 years. Everytime I think of you, I feel like the most xin fu girl cos no one loves me more than you. So sorry I got sick on our anniversary week. But we have our whole lives tgt ahead of us! Happy anniversary!
Came down with some sorta flu and fever..
Haha, I can imagine u guys saying, "Shir! Why u soo weak!"
My last post also blogged during my last sickness.. sometimes I wonder if I have some chronic sickness.. keep falling ill.. LOL! kidding luh. Have to admit maybe I'm really just weak..
Lack of sleep and water and time-off to relax.
Busy whole week, working and playing!
I know I cant be greedy, so I shld take some time and cherish those who were there for me. And for those fakers who weren't u can just go fk off. lol
OK, Thanks juan for being so understanding as always. Christmas is always a busy week for us and we dont have to say much to know whats on each other's mind. So, I will make time for you, no matter what. =) Gotta meet up soon! XOXO.
Thanks my gf, karmun for always cheering me up when I'm down and making me happy whenever we meet! Lurve ur christmas present this year! Will always bring it with me. Muacks!
Thanks vin for being such a sweetheart and a good friend. Always finding time for me though u're so busy with the tough life in army. Must jiayou yea! Huggies!
Thanks mei, for ur late-night-cant-sleep company and with you its like our world of our own. Crazy and quarrelling times are never ending..! wahaha.. muackmuack..
Thanks feng for visiting me after work on several occasions.
Thanks to kt, my honourable ass friend who happen to see me working, twice! U nv fail to be my "great" friend. LOL!
Thanks to those who wished me merry christmas!
Lastly, to my deariest lao gong, thanks for being there with me everyday and everynight for the last 4 years. Everytime I think of you, I feel like the most xin fu girl cos no one loves me more than you. So sorry I got sick on our anniversary week. But we have our whole lives tgt ahead of us! Happy anniversary!
Sat afternoon. Everyone shld be outside doing sth. Shopping, movie, eating, etc. I'm here, at home, blogging.. Haha
Sick.
Antibiotics and strong pain killers making me drowsy. But I cant seem to rest properly.
Gonna be out of a job real soon.
Back to my slacking days?
I dont think so.
At least last time got people to pei wo. Love those slacking days.
Now no company, only got facebook.
Super uber no life.
Next week class outing I cant go!
Sobs!
Working on christmas eve and day, although no OT, I hope sales go sky high!
Bored.
Im like talking random things.
boo.
Sigh. Come back to me.
So my slacking days are over. Money earning days are running.
20 more days to christmas!
10 more days to no more braces!
4 more hours to see my dear!
I lost my piano file. Damn sian. Seems like I lost the music part of me ever since I started work. sobs!
And now Im slacking here with no scores to play. No one to pei. I used to love my slacky days but now I feel so bored! Nth to do!
If I said I missed you, would you care? So hard to get what you want sometimes. haha, must really learn to be content!!!!
Lucky I bought our anniversary gift early. Hee. This month not much left after cpf reduction.
Everyone asking me to change job. Get something with better future prospects. But I'm happy there. Little pay also nvm. Though my mom minds cos little pay means little pay for her too. zzz. I stil think teaching music earns the most. But I dowan to teach! Later I become like my mom how! ZOMG kill me.
I dowan science le. Enough for now. How. Can I just be a housewife! lol everyday just buy 4D and hope to win first prize. HAHA!
Teach me to be happier-go-lucky.
20 more days to christmas!
10 more days to no more braces!
4 more hours to see my dear!
I lost my piano file. Damn sian. Seems like I lost the music part of me ever since I started work. sobs!
And now Im slacking here with no scores to play. No one to pei. I used to love my slacky days but now I feel so bored! Nth to do!
If I said I missed you, would you care? So hard to get what you want sometimes. haha, must really learn to be content!!!!
Lucky I bought our anniversary gift early. Hee. This month not much left after cpf reduction.
Everyone asking me to change job. Get something with better future prospects. But I'm happy there. Little pay also nvm. Though my mom minds cos little pay means little pay for her too. zzz. I stil think teaching music earns the most. But I dowan to teach! Later I become like my mom how! ZOMG kill me.
I dowan science le. Enough for now. How. Can I just be a housewife! lol everyday just buy 4D and hope to win first prize. HAHA!
Teach me to be happier-go-lucky.
Spend all day at home today. Doing nth. Watch tv, eat, go toilet. Really.
Gotten down with a bad sore throat. urgh, hurts.
Bored.
Spending time with myself is really boring. U'll start to think of the things that happened the last week, and the weeks before and u start to miss all the things that were forgotten. I hate it. I hate to miss you and cant do anything about it.
Being alone is emo-ing sia. Cant get anything done but lazy to do anything. Hah, sounds totally like me. lol!
Tml is another start of the week. Lucky, I dont dread to go to work.
Oh wells, back to the busy retail life, enjoying life like u told me to.
Lived with no regrets.
Gotten down with a bad sore throat. urgh, hurts.
Bored.
Spending time with myself is really boring. U'll start to think of the things that happened the last week, and the weeks before and u start to miss all the things that were forgotten. I hate it. I hate to miss you and cant do anything about it.
Being alone is emo-ing sia. Cant get anything done but lazy to do anything. Hah, sounds totally like me. lol!
Tml is another start of the week. Lucky, I dont dread to go to work.
Oh wells, back to the busy retail life, enjoying life like u told me to.
Lived with no regrets.
The time now is 7.55PM
And I havent open sale yet. Yes u can read that again. HAVENT OPEN SALE! Zero, kosong, zilch!
Die liao lor 1.5 hr more to go and 0 sales! Boohooohooohoo!!
All kinds of people in this world.
Which is why I like doing retail. Can get to see all kinds of people.
Good-looking
Weirdo
Nerds
Students
Rich
Noisy
Nice
Just like friends
There are good friends, just friends and "friends". And those who claim that they are ur "good friends" but they are not really there when u really need them.
Everytime I tell myself, "suan le bah". I can only do so for that moment. How can you really just "suan le". Tell urself to forget it, that its not worth it. But when the memories start pulling you back, u're back to square one - telling urself to "just suan le". Vicious cycle.
I'm always blind to those who are better to me.
We all move on.
I will too.
Which is why I like doing retail. Can get to see all kinds of people.
Good-looking
Weirdo
Nerds
Students
Rich
Noisy
Nice
Just like friends
There are good friends, just friends and "friends". And those who claim that they are ur "good friends" but they are not really there when u really need them.
Everytime I tell myself, "suan le bah". I can only do so for that moment. How can you really just "suan le". Tell urself to forget it, that its not worth it. But when the memories start pulling you back, u're back to square one - telling urself to "just suan le". Vicious cycle.
I'm always blind to those who are better to me.
We all move on.
I will too.
Its 2.30am and I cant sleep..
Feel like my body is dying and I just wish it could. Being so hero thinking I was so strong. When I'm not at all. I havent been sick for so long and now comes the flu, fever and gastric. Luckily I'm able to take off tml. The panadol is making my tummy hurt.
Just wished u could be with me at this moment.
I miss you.
I missed all the late and sleepless nights.
Think maybe I work too hard, have been too busy. I hate it.
I miss piano.
I miss music.
I missed all the things I loved and yet, I couldn't be more xin fu. =)
Feel like my body is dying and I just wish it could. Being so hero thinking I was so strong. When I'm not at all. I havent been sick for so long and now comes the flu, fever and gastric. Luckily I'm able to take off tml. The panadol is making my tummy hurt.
Just wished u could be with me at this moment.
I miss you.
I missed all the late and sleepless nights.
Think maybe I work too hard, have been too busy. I hate it.
I miss piano.
I miss music.
I missed all the things I loved and yet, I couldn't be more xin fu. =)
10am:
Picnic for 2!
Fruit salad, hot dog, nuggets and sandwich. Haha. looks little right. But we sat there for 2 hours also cannot finish. Ate finish hot dogs and nuggets only.
Note: All food personally prepared by me okay! lol.
Presents! Each letter has a question inside for which he must guess what item it is. 5 out of 5, he scores!! There's nothing in "U" cos I forgot to write my message inside.. zZz.
The yellow couple sits under a umbrella at 11.45 cos its damn freaking hot!!
Went back to her place to slack after the picnic and think of what to do later.
She takes a afternoon nap while he plays games and watch tv. Nuaaaaaa...
5.30pm:
Watched Pandorum at Iluma, Bugis.
The ticket-seller asked me: "Are u above 16?"
I was thinking, "KNS, duhhh, are you?"
I said ya, and she replied, "Our people will random check your IC in the cinema ok."
I just nodded. Wth. I'M 20 lar u biatch.
Dammmm freaking scary can!! Holding on to Lao Gong's arm for my dear life throughout the whole show.
8pm:
Dinner at Ma Maison.
Screams pudding!!!
Our appetiser:
Picnic for 2!
Fruit salad, hot dog, nuggets and sandwich. Haha. looks little right. But we sat there for 2 hours also cannot finish. Ate finish hot dogs and nuggets only.Note: All food personally prepared by me okay! lol.
Presents! Each letter has a question inside for which he must guess what item it is. 5 out of 5, he scores!! There's nothing in "U" cos I forgot to write my message inside.. zZz.
The yellow couple sits under a umbrella at 11.45 cos its damn freaking hot!!Went back to her place to slack after the picnic and think of what to do later.
She takes a afternoon nap while he plays games and watch tv. Nuaaaaaa...
5.30pm:
Watched Pandorum at Iluma, Bugis.
The ticket-seller asked me: "Are u above 16?"
I was thinking, "KNS, duhhh, are you?"
I said ya, and she replied, "Our people will random check your IC in the cinema ok."
I just nodded. Wth. I'M 20 lar u biatch.
Dammmm freaking scary can!! Holding on to Lao Gong's arm for my dear life throughout the whole show.
8pm:
Dinner at Ma Maison.
Screams pudding!!!
Our appetiser:
Cheese Fritters with vinegar sauce
Ginerale for her&
Shirley Temple for him
Omu (Omellette)-Rice for him&
(She forgot to take photo of hers..zZz)
Homemade Caramel Pudding for Us!!This is really to die for! lols.
Happy Birthday to You and Happy 3 years and 10 months to Us!Retail is tiring, that I can tolerate. But every weekend burning out.. thats really tiring. Although is go out enjoy, but omg I miss my nua-ing life at home! The only rest time I have is during work, when there are no customers. I'll just play my laptop, talk to the aunties around me and day dream. Stil not much of resting cos cannot nap! =/
Later going down to pei Gf and Feng to cut hair. Haha, I'm not cutting cos my hair nice enuf alr. LOL! bhb, no la cos I wana leave long hair. Then afterwards gotta go grocery shopping for tml's surprise for my lao gong. Hopefully he wont be stil feeling sick. *HUG*
And then at night, gotta meet hannah and juan for dinner celebrate hannah's belated birthday. Everyweek its like this. Not that I dun like it, I mean out with friends is not a crime, can enjoy, catch up. But when I reach home I'm almost dead.
ok, gotta go dry my hair and get ready. =)
P.S. Thanks lao gong for getting me a new phone for my room. Weee, can disturb u whenever I want now. XD